MARBLE FALLS, Texas (KXAN) — A Marble Falls dad is hoping to skip the uncomfortable act of trying to sell random kitchen products to his neighbors, but still fundraise the money needed for his young son’s school to build a chicken coop. The result is a GoFundMe we think you need to read.

Jacob Taylor says Tierra Vista Montessori School sent home catalogs to parents — inside: a “Let’s Taco About It” tortilla warmer, an avocado peeler, an egg bite mold (we don’t even know) and a gourmet melon baller, among other products you didn’t know you needed — and don’t.

  • 'Tortilla warmer' listed in catalogue
  • 'Egg bite mold' listed in catalogue
  • 'Avocado peeler' listed in catalogue

Taylor didn’t want to go door-to-door with his 18-month-old son selling avocado peelers and gourmet melon ballers so he started a GoFundMe instead, pleading with the public to spare him from having to make a sales pitch to his neighbors.

“So what stand am I taking, exactly? Here it is: you give me $5. That’s it. You give me $5, I stop bugging you about fundraisers, everyone is happy. I don’t have to drag my kid all over the neighborhood trying to sell you an avocado peeler for $12 (a real item in this catalog) and you don’t have to give me money for a giant piece of crap you’ll never use or enjoy,” Taylor wrote in the GoFundMe.

“A ‘tortilla warmer’ for 18 $^*&# dollars!!! Do you know what the difference is between this and just sticking your tortillas in the microwave? $18, that’s what!”

Jacob Taylor, GoFundMe

The other benefit, Taylor points out, is that 100% of the money from the GoFundMe will go toward the school and to the chicken coop, which will teach the students about sustainable agriculture. Meanwhile, if you buy products from the catalog only 40% of the money will make it to the school, according to a letter sent home to parents.

To break that down: For an $18 egg bite mold, only roughly $7 would go to the school. Taylor also points out that: “You can literally get the exact same thing on Amazon for $11.88. So you can get an egg mold and STILL have an extra $6.12 to donate to a chicken coop.”

Taylor has been a teacher for 16 years and knows the struggles schools face to raise money. He himself has had students come to him to buy catalog products. His issue is not with the fundraiser itself, just the tool to raise the money.

“Since we’re teachers, we have the perspective of ‘we will we will do anything to provide what the kids need.’ In fact, I posted an update on the GoFundMe that one of my friends said that they would donate $20 to our GoFundMe if I let my daughter cut my hair,” Taylor said. You can see from the below video that Taylor indeed did just that.

“Teachers are willing to sacrifice our dignity to help the kids,” he said.

Taylor assures us that all of the money will all go to the school. In fact, you may be able to spare other parents from selling their catalog products too.

“Please, give me $5. I swear I’m going to give it to the school, I just really, really, REALLY don’t want to have to go sell stuff to strangers,” Taylor wrote.

You can find Taylor’s GoFundMe here.